its gonna to be change...

well well... i doent think tat time is as the life brief candle...
pass slowly? no way!
its just looks like opening school yesterday, but its already holiday now...
but the important thing is the XRISMAS IS COMING SOON!!
what the... its too fast...
i just go for decorate the xrismas tree, all for the xrimas day in church today...
the tree tat i made with auntie hv been placed at the front door!! hehe....
the tree had tied a lot of ribbon, and hv some expensive jingle-bell~~
but its take a lot of time to complete it...
me and auntie start making the tree, and decorate the tree at 9.30a.m ,but we complete it at 3.29p.m.
but, i've back to my 舅婆's house at 11.45 for taking my lunch...but those auntie and others still making the tree....sorry auntie, i'm getting rest, hehe...
whatever, I LIKE XRISMAS!!
but last year i doesnt here when xrismas...
and this year will be the same....damn==
but, i still like xrismas^^
this few time, Alice hv teach me to play the keyboard...
but my keyboard the second day i buy alr rosak!!the sound so bad...worst....
so i'hv go to the church practice, continue our lesson...
but finally....i found tat myself...my finger......is too SHORT!!
WHAT!!! mama!! how come my finger so short?
oh lord, can u make my finger longer? so i can play the piano well,can? please.....@@

these was my holiday, is it colourful? erm...i think yes^^ because I LIKE XRISMAS
the time is pass day by day, the day i leave is near and near....

-

我...好像笨蛋...
什么事都做不好似的
问我，我为什么存在？
....我不知道
我，既不漂亮，不聪明，画画得不好，歌唱得不好，演讲...也都不在我手中了....
我，就只能，就只能走妈妈选定的路
要上大学，要文凭....要一切的一切....
是 我想要的吗？
我...不知道

舞台，是一个我从来不敢奢望的梦...
但偏偏，却让我有机会站在上面
让我迷恋，让我无法轻易忘记
可是，上天又在一次和我开玩笑
因为舞台，遭到朋友的背叛
赫...可笑...不管我多么努力
最可笑的不是尼达不到梦想，而是梦想就在你身边，而你无论怎么抓也抓不住....
哈...我不允许在台上，有任何的过失..
演讲，我不允许忘稿，不允许舌头打结
唱歌，不允许音调不稳，不允许走音
可是....这是否太难完成了呢？
为什么，我就是那样？

我不漂亮...
都有人那么说，可是就算别人难看
也不会那样说出口吧？
而我，却要忍受他们对我的批评....
我难看....我不怪你

我好像，一点存在的理由都没有也...
呵呵....我没资格再谈我的未来，我的梦想了
这一切，离我都太远了
紫薇，会到新加坡念书，会和他姐姐一样出色吧！
jean, 想当医生
罗以惠，想当歌星，明星
他们，都在为自己的理想，梦想前进着
而我....
已经没有了....

Jacqueline....抱歉，我做不了和你以前那样
我恢复不了习扬说的自信的笑容...
恢复不了，启贤得开心果
一切的一切，都回不来了
我已经不存在了
以前的我，已消失得无影无终了
很抱歉....让你们失望了
对不起...